I Love You Like a Fat Kid Loves…Peanut Butter…?

Awkward moment of the day:  It wasn’t even 8am and I had already encountered an awkward moment…I kept smelling peanut butter on my way to work.  I realized this couldn’t be a good situation…Where was it?! On my hand?! On my face?! In my hair?! On my shirt?!.  Fortunately it was NOT in my hair, but on my hand, leftover from this morning’s breakfast.  What makes this so awkward is my fat-kid obsession with peanut butter and the sad confession that this is the 2nd time this has happened in the last 2 weeks.  Perhaps I need to work to better contain myself with my morning peanut butter breakfast…Although, the combination of egg whites, 2 kinds of jelly, 1 whole wheat English muffin, and an entire tablespoon of peanut butter is cause for celebration.  Oh shut up…you know you find little things to make your mornings worthwhile…

I met up with a few friends this weekend to celebrate a close friend’s birthday.  I showed up a little early to give her dad a gift for providing me with some much-needed legal advice regarding my “lease flee”.  After I handed him the card, and after many “Oh you didn’t have to do this” and “Oh yes, I did” came the hilariously awkward moment of physical and mental hesitation and…”Should I open this now…?”   HAA!

Which leads me to my awkward topic of the day:  Isn’t the act of giving/receiving gifts so strangely awkward?  Not only is it awkward to open a gift in front of the person that gave it to you for fear of the following possible scenarios:

  1. under/overreaction (ability to hide facial expressions)
  2. not knowing what the gift even is
  3. feeling guilty if the person spent too much (or bitter if it’s from the dollar aisle at Target)
  4. your response after you’ve processed the gift.  To hug or not to hug?
  5. How many times do you say “thank you” before everyone thinks…”ok…that’s enough…moving on…”

Similarly, the act of gift giving is just as awkward.  Even when I know I’m giving someone a totally stellar gift, I hate watching them unwrap the gift, watching their facial reaction (they may not think it’s as stellar as you thought they would…total bummer) or they just may not have made over it like you thought they would with the “OMG thank you SO much!”, “This is such a great gift!”, and “I feel bad, I didn’t get you anything!”…

GAH!  When did gift giving/receiving become so awkward?  Or is it just awkward because I’m awkward and surround myself with similarly awkward people?  Mystery of life…

And let’s not even get into family birthdays/Christmases when you have to watch each person individually unwrap the gift.  Torture.  My mom’s family doesn’t pay attention to anyone as they open gifts.  But now that I think about it, even THAT is awkward…

More peanut butter excitement:  Pumpkin banana oatmeal for lunch, with a side of Jif’s Natural Peanut Butter (of course!).  Do they have a 12 steps program for people addicted to peanut butter?

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One thought on “I Love You Like a Fat Kid Loves…Peanut Butter…?

  1. I hate watching their face, AND I struggle with my own facial expression! Do I smile with anticipation because I think I know how much they’ll love it (and thus put pressure on them TO love it)? Or do I pretend like, “Whatever, it’s no big deal. I just picked this up on the way over”, in case they don’t?. I’m pretty sure I’m the only one that worries about this.

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